I have thought about blogging on this topic for a long time, but didn’t have an appropriate venue until now. I just don’t get it, but it must be true because I have come across this phenomena way too many times, as have those closest to me – namely Jeff, my daughter, my sisters, and a few good friends. In simple terms, women seem to be slobs, at least when it comes to public restrooms. I cannot tell you how many times I have been shopping and needed to use the ladies’ room. I have encountered really gross stuff, whereas Jeff has used the men’s room at the same store, mall, etc. and told me it was clean. And I know he doesn’t have a different definition of clean because he never misses the toilet and always puts the seat down at home – I love you, dear! And when my daughter has to pee really badly and cannot wait, she will use the men’s john if it is a single one. And at those establishments, she has reported that the men’s john was spotless whereas the ladies’ room, which I waited to use, was disgusting.
What gives girls?
I have also encountered this gross-out behavior at my last job and was left to wonder on countless occasions if my female co-workers exhibited this disgusting toilet etiquette at home. Is the cleanliness disparity between men’s rooms and ladies’ rooms caused by anatomy? After all, men can just whip it out – that would explain number 1, but not number 2. And they don’t have all the paraphernalia that comes with Surfing the Crimson Wave, as Cher said in Clueless.
I can recall my favorite aunt (who had three boys) complaining that they always pissed on the floor – she had bathroom envy when she visited us since my mom had three girls and there was never pee on the floor. So guys can surely miss the bowl, although it would be hard to miss the urinal, and again, that explains number 1, but not number 2. And obviously those men’s rooms with single stalls my daughter used had toilets, not urinals!
Stop reading now if you find this subject offensive, because I am about to get graphic. These are some of the choice things I have encountered in public restrooms, including at work.
- Unflushed pee and doo-doo
- Pee all over the toilet seat
- Pee on the floor
- Wet toilet paper remnants on the seat and floor
- Doo-doo streaks/skid marks in the bowl
- Doo-doo on the wall behind the bowl
- Bloody, unflushed tampons
- Bloody pads sticking out of the sanitary napkin bin
There are a few things you can do to prevent unflushed bits in the bowl – take the time to glance at the bowl after you flush to ensure everything was sucked down – if not, flush again. You don’t need to share your doo-doo and pee-pee with the rest of the world to prove you are potty trained, like you once did with your mama.
And your fellow females don’t need to know that you have your period – we are all suffering, honey and have been through it ourselves. The first time I encountered this particular disgusting toilet etiquette was in junior high. In fact, I encountered this so many times that I nearly pissed my pants several times to avoid using those gross bathrooms. I suppose this behavior is understandable in adolescents – after all, getting your period for the first time is traumatic, but when you work with females who are in their 30s, 40s, and 50s, it really is inexcusable.
What gives girls?
I envy my girlfriends who seem to have the bladder of a camel – they rarely have to use public restrooms. Alas, the older I get, the more I have to pee … I just wish my fellow females would learn to be considerate.